by John and Jane Gilman, Corvallis, Oregon rev 09/3/98

The following is a summary of initial law enforcement and SOSCF action against our family. SOSCF action is expected through September 15. Law enforcement involvement will likely also terminate on that date.

On Sunday, June 7, our five year-old daughter Alexandra was, after several warnings, disciplined by Jane with a wooden spoon for playing under the dining room table, rather than finishing her dinner. Normally obedient, Alex chose to again leave the table. Jane disciplined her again with a wooden spoon. Jane realized she might have been too harsh, and apologized to Alex. Alex accepted the apology. She apologized to Jane for misbehaving, and finished her dinner. As far as the Gilman family was concerned, that was the end of it.

The next day, Alex's teacher either saw or was informed of welts on Alex's upper thighs. The teacher called Corvallis PD. Corvallis PD called Benton County. A deputy was dispatched to our home.

Deputy Fontaine met John as he returned home from work. The deputy interviewed Alex. Alex showed the marks to John and the deputy. Shocked, John verified Jane's spanking the previous evening. John allowed Fontaine to take pictures of Alex, but declined him access to our home. Fontaine then questioned Jane. Though surprised and frightened, Jane acknowledged the spanking. She told Fontaine that she might have hit Alex harder than intended. Worried about Fontaine’s intent, she declined to let Fontaine into our home, and declined to show the spoon to him. Jane asked Fontaine what he would do next. He said, "If you don't want to talk to me, you'll find out." Fontaine left.

According to SCF caseworker Diane Aspergren, Fontaine called SCF and said, "I have a suspected child abuse case, and the mother won’t talk to me. What do you want me to do?" "Take the child," replied Aspergren.

Ignorant of the above conversation, John left our home to call for legal counsel, and to call friends with whom the children could stay. Meanwhile, Fontaine returned with a Deputy Burright. The two called for Jane. Jane came to the door, but declined to open it for them. They told her she was under arrest. When Jane still declined, they kicked in our door. Jane told them she could not leave our children unattended, that John was nearby, and that she needed to page John. The officers denied permission, then wrestled her to the floor, injuring her knee, leg, wrists, and back.

Jane called for our nine year-old son Nathaniel to come downstairs and call a neighbor. He did so. As Jane was being escorted to the cruiser, the neighbor arrived. The deputies allowed her to take our three children to her home. As the neighbor arrived at her home, Burright returned to her home in his cruiser. He told our neighbor he'd been ordered to take Alex into custody. After packing a pillow, blanket, and book, the neighbor surrendered Alex. Meanwhile, Jane was taken to the county jail, and booked on Resisting and Criminal Mistreatment.

Shortly thereafter, John returned home. On impulse, he stopped at the neighbor's house. There, he was informed of events. Jane called from the jail and told John she'd been released. John picked Jane up. Fearing SCF would come back for their other two children, John and Jane took them to a friend's home, then returned to their own.

On Tuesday morning, John and Jane found counsel. Jane was arraigned by Scott Heiser before Judge Dickerson. Our attorney called SCF, asking their plans and Alex's condition. He was told there was no record of an Alexandra Gilman in their system, but they would check on it. By that afternoon, Alex was located. A custody hearing was scheduled for Wednesday morning. We heard nothing further about Alex. We were told an investigation would be made, but none of our neighbors, nor our children's other teachers were ever interviewed.

By John and Jane Gilman rev. 9/4/98

The attack on our family by law enforcement and SOSCF has had severe effects on us, and our children. Our extended family, neighbors, friends, church, and coworkers have been hurt as well:

Alexandra (age 6) - Her "caregivers" did not bathe her. They did not ask if she were on medication. Though she was was terrified, they demonstrated no physical affection to her. When Alex began to cry for her family, the foster mother attempted to comfort Alex by showing her a photo album of abused children who never returned home. Unsurprisingly, Alex has had frequent nightmares in which she is taken from us and never returned. For weeks, Alex spontaneously told little snippets of stories about her experience with the other family. None were particularly gut-wrenching, but it is evident she was thinking about what happened. The incident turned Alex into a "clingy" child. As of August 16^th, she still clings to Jane physically. She now cries easily when verbally corrected. She has told John, that she still thinks about being taken - that it happened, and that it might happen again - nearly every day.

Nathaniel (age 9) and Samantha (age 7) - Initially, both were in shock. For the first time in their lives, Mom and Dad couldn’t protect them. They reacted by walking about in a daze. Both were worried that the people who took Alex would come back for them. They were angry and hurt by what happened. They have lost all trust in the police. Recently, they saw The Sound of Music for the first time. Both told Jane and John - without any prompting - that the Von Trapp family and the Nazis were just like our family and the police. As of August 16^th, Samantha is still somewhat subdued, and worried. She wants the whole thing to be over. Nathaniel’s behavior seems to have returned to normal. When questioned, however, he is still hurt and angry. All three children jump with fright when someone knocks at the door.

Jane - The night of her arrest and Alex’s removal, Jane alternated between anguish for Alex, tears of sadness, and anger at the evil that befell us. She was in pain from her injuries from the arrest, but this paled in comparison to immense emotional stress. Jane slept perhaps two hours both days Alex was gone. Much of the night, Jane tossed and turned, reliving the break-in; hoping and praying that her daughter would be safe. When Alex was returned, Jane was able to sleep better. During the days, Jane still lived as though in a fog, barely able to manage basic activities. She lost weight. It was her constant worry that SOSCF might change its mind and come back for Alex, and this time take Samantha and Nathaniel as well. As of August 16^th, Jane hesitates to let the children out of her sight. What the deputies and SOSCF have done to us, she thinks of daily. Jane is very sensitive to the least injury to any of the children - lest it be used as leverage to take away our children. She has become over-protective.

John - Like Jane, filled with shock, anguish, and anger. John felt guilty about allowing police access to Alex; about being away from his family in their hour of need; and about failing to get the kids to safety. He felt the sanctity of the home he loved had been violated. John didn’t get more than four or five hours’ sleep until late June. He lost his appetite: by June 19^th, he had lost twelve pounds. He was ineffective at work. He was consumed by a desire to protect his family, to find out about the legal system and SCF. As of August 16^th, he can sleep normally. However, he still feels a lingering lack of energy, and total disinterest in routine house maintenance. His involvement in community organizations is suffering. He has flashbacks, and can’t concentrate well at work.

Friends, family, neighbors, and members of church - The most common reaction has been disbelief, followed by shock, then anger. One good friend, eight months pregnant, cried out and collapsed. Most have either helped or offered to help by appearing with us in court, preparing meals, or keeping the kids at a moment’s notice. Several have told us they’ve lost sleep over the incident. For their care, cards, and prayers we are thankful.

Other effects - Never again will our children set foot in public school. Never again will our home or children feel secure. Always we will watch our backs. We feel violated by officials who are incensed by a bruise, but are utterly indifferent to the grievous damage caused by their own actions. We had planned to spend a good bit of the summer camping with the kids. Instead, we stayed home and licked our wounds. We had planned to fly the family back to the mid-west to visit grandparents this Christmas, but fighting criminal charges has spent the money and the vacation. We remain amazed at the power and heartlessness of a system that claims to protect children.